Big Family Life - What It's REALLY Like

 

I grew up in a big family. It wasn't a traditional big family - my mom had 4 kids, my dad had 3 kids, then they got married and had me. Technically, I have half siblings, but I prefer to drop the half, and just call them my siblings. I grew up in a family with 8 children, but because I was so much younger, I also got to experience life as an "only" child when I was a teenager. It definitely gave me a unique perspective!

I always wanted to have 4 kids, but didn't expect that to happen, so I am definitely surprised that we have more. I know we are considered a big family, but truthfully, it doesn't feel that way. When you grow up with 7 older siblings, a family with 5 kids doesn't seem THAT big. Where we live, however, our family is unusual. 2 or 3 kids is the norm here, and it's hard to find young families nearby with more than 3 children.

We get a lot of questions and comments about our family, in real life and online, so I figured I would give the inside scoop! If you are a long time reader, you were able to watch us go from a family with just two kids and no plans to have anymore to a family with five kids, including one who has Down syndrome. Yes, they are all ours, yes, they are spaced out in age, yes, we know how it happens, and yes, we LOVE our big family. So if you're wondering what big family life is really like, here goes...

The Impossible Back To School Decision

2020 was a year of firsts for so many of us. It was a year full of making impossible decisions, and doing things we never imagined we would have to do. Like most parents, the back to school decision weighed heavily on our minds for so many months. Do we send our kids back to school, do we opt for virtual learning, do we enroll all of our kids in cyber school, or do we just start homeschooling?

It was truly an impossible decision to make. We weighed the pros and cons of every choice we were offered, and nothing seemed right. We changed our minds multiple times, and didn't really confirm our decision until a few weeks ago. The 2020-2021 school year is going to be even stranger than this past school year, but the impossible decision has been made. 

On Tuesday, our four older kids are going to be starting school in person, five days a week. It was not a decision that we made lightly, considering we have a child who has extra needs. We plan to reassess our decision at the end of each week, and we fully expect more curveballs to be thrown at us over the next 9 months. All we can do is mask up, continuously remind our crew of proper hygience during a pandemic, stop second guessing our decision, and prepare to face every possibility throughout the school year!

Love and Kindness Begins At Home

I love. I love fiercely and I love unconditionally. My family taught me to love others, no matter their race, gender, religion, political affiliation, or sexual orientation. They taught me to always be kind and respectful. They also taught me to speak up when something is wrong. Love and kindness filled my childhood, and I carried that with me as I grew. Now I put my all into raising kind, loving children, because it is my duty as their mother. Love and Kindness begin at home.

There is so much hatred surrounding us right now. It is weighing heavily on me, and I simply can't understand how or why people feel this way. Sometimes I just want to run away from it all, but I know I have to do my part to help change the world: to speak up, to speak out, to do better, to be better, and to teach my kids to always be GOOD human beings. 

I traded writing for personal reflection over the past few weeks, and also immersed myself in research. I was always a "neutral" person who did everything I could to ease tensions, and help people get along. I avoided serious topics like the plague. But now, more than ever, I need to lift up my voice with so many others. I'm still kind. But I will speak up about injustice. I will speak up about how change needs to occur. And I will speak up about how important it is to start that change within your home, with yourself and with your own family.

How To Set Up a Simple & Fun Homeschooling Corner

This post contains affiliate links. If you click through, and make a purchase, I will earn a commission. Everything I recommend has been tested by me or my family!

We are on week five of remote learning, and we've finally found our groove! Just kidding...every day is a new adventure around here. Some days are really good, and some days are REALLY bad. (I didn't sign up for this!!!) The homeschooling corner, however, is my A+ project!

BSC (Before Social Distancing), I was a homeschooling mom to a 15 year old, and I didn't have much to do other than to oversee his education. Now, I'm overseeing four educations, actively assisting my 8 year old, fully supporting my 6 year old, who has Down syndrome, and "attending" daily circle time, and 5 additional teletherapies a week for him...all with a needy baby on my hip. The terms OCI, remote learning, Zoom meetings, and teletherapy are a part of my daily lingo.  (I repeat...I didn't sign up for this!) 

After the first few weeks of trial and error, it became apparent that we needed a homeschooling space. 3 of my 4 school-age kids will be returning to school in the Fall (PLEASE!), and Dylan only needs a laptop and a shelf for supplies, so I didn't want to do anything major. A homeschooling corner was the solution, and guess what? I think we'll keep it!

How We Teach Our Kids To Love and Respect the Earth

I think this year, on Earth Day, we're all appreciating our planet just a bit more! With nowhere to go, many of us are relying on the great outdoors to keep us busy. Sometimes I feel like this was Earth's way of saying, "I need a break!!!"

As a mom, I want my children to succeed and do big things. More importantly, I want them to be kind and respectful, to love equally, and realize they CAN make a difference. Kindness is not just for our fellow human beings. It also should be directed at the world we live in!

It's our job to teach our kids to love and respect our planet. We started teaching our kids early, but there is always work to do. As adults, WE are still learning, so we're in this together!

Currently...in Quarantine

We just began our sixth week of social distancing, and our fourth week of online learning! When this all began, I thought for sure we would be back to normal life within 2-3 weeks, and definitely 6 weeks tops, but as the days went by, I began to suspect that it would be much longer. Now, I'm starting to worry this is going to extend through Summer. 

Life sure is different now. We don't go anywhere, but our days are long and busy! Some days it feels like we've got this, and other days our emotions are all over the place. I'm beginning to think we could have our own reality show at this point: Quarantine with 5 Crazy Kids!

I have been sharing snippets of our everyday lives on social media, and so many people have told me that it either makes them laugh, or that they can relate so much. Yes, we have "normal" days and incredible moments with our sweet kids, but when you put 7 people together in a 4 bedroom house, things can escalate QUICKLY!

Lexie's a Teenager! (13th Birthday Interview & Photoshoot}

She was born on February 22, 2007 at 4:16 PM. She entered the world with just a few quick pushes, and when everyone in the room screamed, "It's a GIRL!" the tears streamed down my cheeks. She was exactly the baby I had been praying for to complete our little family. 

13 years went by far too quickly, and our baby girl filled our lives with so much love. With each passing year, I anticipated her to pull away from us more and more, as many kids naturally do, but her love for her family is fierce. She is still as close to us as ever, and our love for her is immeasurable.

Lexie is a rare gem. She is beautiful on the inside and out. She is incredibly mature, responsible, and smart, and is one of the kindest, most compassionate human beings I've ever met. She is truly an amazing person, and I have no doubt she's going to do great things. At 4:16 PM on February 22, 2020, Lexie officially became a teenager, and the next stage of her childhood began!

Why We Started Homeschooling Our Teenager

Although I'm now homeschooling four kids, homeschooling is not a new concept to me. This past Fall, we pulled our then 14 year old son out of the public school he had been attending since Kindergarten, and enrolled him in Cyber School.  It was a bit of an adjustment for us, but it's a method that works well for him at this time. 

I wasn't quite ready to take full responsibility for educating a teenager, so we opted to have him do online schooling after doing our research and reaching out to other parents. Managing his education, making sure he gets PE and outside learning experiences, encouraging hobbies, and allowing him to lead a normal social life (until social distancing happened) is my responsibility. It wasn't a decision we made lightly. We really wished he could continue in our school district, but it just wasn't working for him, and we knew in our hearts that we had to make changes.

There are many factors that led us to this decision, which I will finally share with you. After several months, we are starting to see little steps in the right direction, so we know we made the right decision. Little did we know when we embarked on this path that we would have 3 other kids joining him at home months later!

The First Official Day of Quarantine Homeschool

When my four older kids went back to school in September, I never would have guessed that I would be homeschooling one - let alone FOUR - kids by April! One child is homeschooled by choice, and the other three are now homeschooled by necessity. It's definitely a huge adjustment for all of us!

I started homeschooling Dylan in November. To be fair, he is a teenager, and he does Cyber School, so I'm not really teaching him. It's just my job to oversee his education, make sure he gets exercise, give him additional educational experiences, encourage a healthy social life, and make sure he reads and is exposed to the arts. (He is a talented artist, so no problems there!) I still have to share the reasons why we chose this for Dylan, but it has been a positive experience for him and for me!

Homeschooling is definitely not for everyone. While it works well for Dylan, it isn't the best option for Lexie, Lily, and Liam, who thrive in a public school setting. Lily and Lexie are very smart, and they are very involved in school activities. Liam has Down syndrome, which means he has an IEP. He has a wonderful team working to help him thrive - a general ed teacher, a special ed teacher, a para, a speech therapist, an occupational therapist, a physical therapist, and a social worker. He receives all therapy at school, and has so much support. The three of them LOVE school, which is why this new homeschooling adventure is difficult for all of us. But with schools now closed indefinitely, it's now our new normal...

How To Help Your Baby Sleep Better With Little Ones

This post is sponsored by Little Ones and we received product in exchange for this honest review.

Our fifth baby will be celebrating his first birthday in just a few short months, and he still isn’t sleeping well! Needless to say, this mom of five is exhausted. I knew something needed to change - SOON - and I had to find a sleep method that would help Coen sleep better!

After having four other children you would think I would have figured this sleep thing out by now. Coen, however, is our first fussy baby, so this is new territory. I have a few theories about why he isn’t sleeping well: 1) I walked so much during my pregnancy that he got used to the constant rocking motion, and needs it to fall asleep. 2) He’s our fifth and final baby, and is very spoiled by his siblings and the rest of our family. Everybody wants to hold him all the time! No matter the cause, I’m tired, he’s tired, and we need to get some sleep!

That’s exactly why I turned to Little Ones for help! Little Ones is an online sleep program that gives you detailed sleep and feeding schedules based on your baby’s age, along with lots of information on sleeping, nutrition, self-settling methods, and much more. We’ve been using it for a few weeks, and we’re starting to see some progress! Here’s why you should consider Little Ones to help your baby (and you) sleep better...

Every Baby Is Different - Coen's Story

This post is sponsored by Evivo but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.

Our fifth baby was a BIG surprise! My husband and I adjusted quickly to the news, and figured what’s one more when we already had four?!?  Our kids ranged in age from 5 through 14, and had been through it all, including a very surprising post-birth diagnosis of Down syndrome. We were experienced parents, and nothing could throw us off our parenting game. Of course we had this under control! 

Or so we thought. Everybody assured us that baby #5 would be the easiest one, but they were wrong. Baby #5 turned out to be a very fussy baby who had feeding issues. It was our first unhappy baby, and we were feeling very stressed. He cried for hours each day, and nothing we did helped. For the first time ever, I was an exhausted new mom, and I felt a tinge of postpartum depression sneaking in. 

Sometimes as a parent, you just have to follow your gut. I KNEW there was something wrong with my sweet baby. I successfully breastfed three other babies, including one that I was told couldn’t breastfeed because of his diagnosis. I was an experienced breastfeeder, and I wasn’t doing anything different. It was up to me to figure out what was going on.

How To Encourage Healthy Sleep Habits in Children with Suzy Snooze - A Review + Giveaway

*I received this product complimentary in exchange of my honest review. 

My kids have always been great sleepers! I consider it a fair trade after all the months of horrible morning sickness that I went through. I know we've been very lucky that our kids have healthy sleep habits, and I'm so grateful for that!

Recently, however, Liam started experiencing some sleep issues. He has shared a room with Dylan since he was born, and got used to having a roommate. With the upcoming arrival of our newest baby, we ended up giving Dylan his own bedroom since he is the oldest, and decided to have Liam share a room with his baby brother. We made the switch a few months ago, and it hasn't exactly been smooth sailing in the sleep department!

Liam has been falling asleep late now that he's alone in his room, and having trouble waking up on time for school. Once he falls asleep, he stays asleep, but getting to that point is the problem! I was so excited to try out BleepBleeps Suzy Snooze, which is a smart nightlight, sleep soother, sleep trainer, and baby monitor all in one. We've been using it for a few weeks now, and it's definitely helping! And guess what? You can enter to win one of your own!

Guitar Lessons for Kids - The Quick, Easy, and Convenient Method

This post is sponsored by Fender but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.

My husband is a self-taught guitar player. As a singer, I always thought it would be fun to learn so I could accompany myself. I never found the time for that, but when my 11 year old daughter recently expressed interest in learning how to play the guitar and keyboard, I couldn't say no!

Unfortunately, with four kids, time and excess money are lacking. That's why I'm so grateful for Fender Play! Lexie (and anybody else in our family) is able to learn how to play guitar through this inexpensive and incredibly convenient learning app! 

Lexie - and 7 year old Lily - just started using Fender Play, and it's working well for them! Learning to play an instrument has numerous benefits for children AND adults. Learning to play guitar, ukulele, or bass with Fender Play is fun and easy! 

Look how well it's working for my kids...

The Value of Date Night With My Daughters

This post is sponsored by Vanguard but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.

With four (soon to be five) kids, time and money are precious things. There is simply never enough time, and sometimes, not enough money. My husband and I have work, a home, and four kids to juggle, but we try our hardest to make quality family time a priority, and we make sure each of our children feels valued and loved.

Investing in our future is so important, but everyday life, and our current needs take priority. Sometimes we focus so much on what we need to buy that we lose sight of what’s right in front of us. As every parent knows, time goes by SO quickly, and those special moments with our children while they are young slip through our fingers. Before we realize it, those moments will be gone, and we will have missed so many amazing opportunities to bond with them.

This past weekend, instead of worrying about what we need to spend our hard-earned money on, I invested my time (and some money) on a date night with my daughters! It was a much needed experience for all three of us!

Kids & Music: The Many Benefits of Music Education

This post is brought to you by Guitar Center and The Motherhood. All opinions are my own.

My husband and I have musical backgrounds. When we were kids, we played instruments in band, sang in the choir, and performed in musicals. We actually met when we were cast as the leads in a musical, as Adam and Eve! As parents of 4, there isn't much time for our musical interests these days, but he still plays guitar, and I sing loudly to show tunes during my Mom Taxi duties. We are trying so hard to make music a big part of our kids' lives!

Raising children is tough. There are many battles to overcome, and sometimes, as parents, we have to seek alternative methods. Music education can benefit ALL kids, and the benefits are endless! Encouraging children to sing or play an instrument can potentially improve many aspects of their lives. Music education builds social skills, creates discipline, leads to higher self-confidence, builds hand-eye coordination skills, leads to academic improvement, improves retention and cognitive reasoning, and allows kids to express themselves. Music can also lower anxiety and improve physical well-being! Just think about it...doesn't music make you feel happy?

My husband and I encourage our kids to make music a daily part of their lives in some form. They might express themselves by creating tunes with a program on the computer, by singing, by dancing, or by banging VERY loudly on instruments, but all four of our kids embrace music. And if they need a little help along the way, Guitar Center is there to help with all forms of music education!

How My Family Stays Active With Fitbit

This post is sponsored by Kohl’s. I was paid for this post and received the included Fitbit as compensation.

Life with a big family is busy! After work, school, activities, and responsibilities in the home, there isn’t much time for anything else. Living a healthy, active lifestyle, however, is one of my family’s priorities!

It’s so important to teach children to make healthy choices and stay fit while they’re young, so healthy living becomes a lifelong habit. Just like everything else, it begins in the home. Kids learn by example! If we want to raise healthy, active kids, we have to be healthy, active parents!

Recently, we became a Fitbit Family! Prior to receiving the Fitbit Versa Ruby, I didn’t even wear a watch. I wasn’t completely convinced that I would use it frequently, but I was wrong. I absolutely love it! I feel lost without it on my wrist, and I use it all the time. My family and I quickly learned that it’s easy and fun to stay in shape with Fitbit. It truly is such a great motivator!

10 Incredibly Important Safety Precautions All Bloggers Should Take To Protect Their Kids Online

Blogging has come so far since I first started sharing my family nearly a decade ago! There's no doubt that blogs are a big business now. But as parenthood blogs continue to gain popularity, it's becoming even more important to take safety precautions to keep children safe in this sometimes scary online world!

A Healthcare App for Busy Moms #AnywhereCare

This is a sponsored post in partnership with The Motherhood on behalf of UPMC.

Whether you are a working mom or a stay-at-home mom, have one kid or 10 kids, life as a mom is busy! As a mom of four, wrangling chaos and juggling kids and schedules is my norm. I don’t have much time to worry about anything else. Worrying about arranging healthcare, especially for sick visits, shouldn’t top my list of worries!

Thankfully, there’s an app for that! UPMC Anywhere Care allows you to have a face-to-face visit with a doctor right from your mobile device or computer! The app is free to download, and it’s also free to sign up for an account. The visits start at $49, but for those with a UPMC Health Plan, the cost is similar to a copay.

If you live in Pennsylvania, you will be able to visit with a UPMC doctor during your video consultation. For those outside of Pennsylvania, you will be able to visit a doctor from American Well, which is an online care group. All video consultations occur in real-time.

The flu seems to be hitting everybody this year, and it can be very serious. Now you can see a quality health care provider with a UPMC AnywhereCare virtual visit without leaving your home! And if you sign up at http://upmchp.us/MHUPMCAnywhereCare by March 5, you will have a chance to win a digital thermometer!

When one of my kids gets sick, it’s a lot of work just to schedule an appointment with their pediatrician. Not only do I have to work around five different schedules, but I also have to arrange childcare for my other kids, unless I want to bring my entire crew to the sick visit.  If that doesn’t work, we end up at Urgent Care after my husband gets home from the office. Although necessary, it does cause added stress for all of us. And if there’s a sick parent? Those appointments rarely happen!

10 Ways to Teach Kids Healthy Tooth Brushing Habits {Featuring WooBamboo!}

DISCLOSURE: I received the products featured in this post in partnership with WooBamboo!

If you have young kids, then you know it can sometimes be a struggle to get them to brush their teeth. It's just one of the many things that kids like to turn into a battle! Brushing teeth is a big part of every daily routine, so it's important to encourage healthy tooth brushing habits as early as possible!

My three older kids have great dental care habits, and they love to visit the dentist, but it's still a work in progress with Liam. I have to get very creative in order to make tooth brushing fun for him. After 3 years of battling him (he is STUBBORN), we finally (almost) won the war!

Over the past few years, I tried it all with Liam. Some methods failed miserably, while others worked like a charm! In an effort to help other parents dealing with the same struggle, I'm sharing ten of my favorite tried and true ways to teach kids healthy tooth brushing habits.

Our T21 Anniversary {GUEST POST}

Happy Monday, my friends! While I am sitting on the beach this week, I enlisted a few blogging friends to take over my blog, so I can enjoy my break. I am so excited to share their content with my readers! First up is Amber from Baby Lemonade Blog, sharing her T21 diagnosis story. Amber's beautiful daughter just celebrated her first birthday last week!

(About that sitting part...if you ever met Liam in person you know that's far from the truth. Most likely, I'm racing up and down the beach trying to keep him from escaping!)

Our T21 Anniversary

{March 1st, 2016} – This date will forever be a turning point in my life. On this date, I heard the words “abnormal test results” for the Trisomy 21 portion of our prenatal screening test. If I had known, I wouldn’t have taken that call in the middle of the work day.

Because Kara is so incredible, it’s easy to say I wish I would have known then what I know now, but it’s not that simple. This was a very hard time for us last year. I needed time to grieve, to learn, to grow. I needed to be there for my husband and know that he was going to be there for me.

Anything after March 1st has become “after we knew.” I look at pictures before that date and think “Those people are so worry-free and uneducated.” I search my own face in photos and see innocence. I want to say, “You just wait…You just wait until the 1st and your world is going to change forever.”
March 1st was the same day we found out we were having a girl.

The calls were divided. I got a call from our physician that afternoon telling me the next step was to meet with a genetic counselor. Shortly after, Jacob got a call with the news of our baby girl. He was to keep the secret and surprise me with our gender reveal that weekend, but you know how plans change…

He did great keeping the secret. When I told him that I needed to hear some good news that afternoon, he shook his head. But then a few minutes later I got a text message. I looked down to see this image illuminated on my screen.

My eyes filled with tears, “I was right?”

“You were right,” he said.

What a day.  

Six days later we met with a genetic counselor and had an ultrasound performed. Seven days after that I had my amniocentesis.

The day the results came back, a friend had come to drop off a gift for Baby Girl. A tiny little black & white dress with a yellow bow. Jacob had told me the news minutes before. She had no idea that she’d be walking into our living room to see me a sobbing mess. I don’t remember if I could even say the words, she has Down syndrome.

Kara has long grown out of that dress, but I packed it away with extra special care and the flood of emotions that it brought back.

Many of my fears have now diminished.

I was so scared that my daughter wouldn’t be smart, beautiful, or strong. Now I feel silly when I think of those feelings because she is all these things and more! I was terrified that she wouldn’t have friends or supporters, but again, I was proven very wrong. Since that day, we have aimed to be experts on everything Down syndrome. I have gained a lot of knowledge, but nothing could have ever prepared me for the love I feel. She has my whole heart.

Termination was never, ever an option in our minds. I feel lucky that our physician did not lead us in that direction. We made it clear from the beginning that the results of the amnio were to prepare us, not so we could talk about a solution.

March 1st, 2016 – I was sick to my stomach with fear and uncertainty, but the fear is nothing compared to the pride I now have for my little girl. The world is a better place with her in it, just you wait and see.

Amber is a first time mother who is crazy about her little girl. She is married to a police officer and has two cuddly pups. She blogs about the ups & downs of being a special needs mom. Follow her on Facebook, Instagram, & Pinterest.