Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Bottoms Up!

Lexie had the distinct privilege of accompanying me to my yearly doctor visit this morning.

When I say doctor, I mean THAT doctor.

I typically rely on my sister to watch the kids, but my nephew has been really sick, and even though she offered, I didn't want to burden her. Plus, I didn't want Lexie to get sick.

She got quite an education today.

My awesome doctor (no, really, he is...he took great care of me when I was dealing with preterm labor) said that he could, ahem, block the view from Lexie. It was a quick, easy visit, and I thought I was in the clear.

The doctor opened the door to leave the room, and Lexie gave me the look.

A look very similar to this one:


She oh so sweetly declared, "Mommy, I saw your buuu-utttt."

Dear Lord.

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While Lexie was taking a nap today, and Dylan was playing a bit of Wii, I curled up on the couch with my book. I ended up dozing off while I was reading.

I woke up, and both of my calf muscles were clenched up. It felt like those awful leg cramps I would get while I was pregnant. I tried to stretch them out, but they wouldn't stop cramping. The right one finally eased, but the left one was hurting so bad, that it felt like my leg was burning.

I have no idea what happened, but I ended up pulling a leg muscle for the first time ever. While I was sleeping. Now, I've got a limp to prove it. And a taped up finger to go along with it. Here's hoping that I don't hurt myself tomorrow!

I swear, the stupidest stuff happens to me. I run over 10 miles a week, and never get hurt, but I manged to pull a muscle in my sleep.

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Last summer, I posted about how I can't kill spiders. I save each and every one that comes into my house. I am the Spider Saver.

Little spiders are okay with me. The bigger they are in size, the more they freak me out.

Like the one that was just a few inches away from me the other night. That baby was bigger than a quarter, and I couldn't move away, due to the fact that I was sitting on the toilet at the time. I bargained with it. If it stayed still and didn't touch me, I promised that I would not kill it, and would take it outside. If it touched me, all bets were off.

I have never peed so quickly in my life.

True to my word, I captured the spider in a little cup, and rain through the house screaming ('cause that's the way to do it), and flung it outside.

Today, the kids discovered a tiny spider that crawled in from our sunporch. Dylan immediately captured it and put it in his bug container. They had a blast watching it.

And hugging it. *shudder*


I finally convinced them to let it go, and hug something a bit cuter.


And this little man? He's going to be a registered Kindergartener, as of Friday.


Stop growing up so fast, buddy!

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Now that I've thoroughly embarrassed myself....

Bottoms Up!

20 comments:

  1. A leg cramp while napping? You might need to get a little potassium in you - eat a banana girl. (And I'm sorry but I did giggle a little when I read it.)

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  2. Ya I've had to take El with me tooo....sigh. Ouch about the calf muscle, hope it feels better today. WTG Dylan!

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  3. LOL at the I see your butt:) My boys always think it is hilarious if they see me in my underwear! I hate, hate, hate spiders too. But I squish them as soon as I see them, no deal making for me!

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  4. Too funny, thanks for the laugh!!

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  5. I amlways make Joel save the spiders and take them outside. Half the time he accidentally pops a leg off. Then he laughs, and I shriek, "It's not funny!!!"

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  6. This post is too funny since I have been there myself. When sofia was about to be born I had to take 3 boys with me to the last appt...you know where they check you to see if you are dialted? Well, I had every intention of sending the boys out at that moment but the doctor did it so fast and didn't think I would be bothered but ummm YEAH! they still talk about when they saw my butt! OMG mortification to the extreme...so humiliating.

    I know I posted a comment on the previous post too but when I just checked it wasn't there but on the fainting thing, yeah I have fainted a few times too and its not good.

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  7. Your "Bottoms Up" story made me giggle! And you are a saint when it comes to spiders! I find the nearest shoe and whack away! I can't stand them at all!

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  8. I hate leg cramps...I rarely get them but when i have...man those suckers hurt! Hope it gets better soon!

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  9. Laughing my butt off! You're too cute and those kiddos of yours are even cuter!
    I'm deathly afraid of killing spiders, I think I'm going to miss them and they'll know I tried killing them and attack me!!! AHH!!

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  10. That is too funny about the your doctors visit! oh and I have had those leg cramps while Im sleep too! they are horrific!!!

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  11. haha she saw your BUTTTTT :)

    leg cramps are KILLER--ouch!

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  12. That is sooo funny!! Sounds like something my daughter Sydney would say. Out of the mouths of babes!! Your kids are adorable!! Thanks for your comments on my blog! Shannon

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  13. LOL at Lexie calling you out. So funny!!

    You knwo what? Leg cramps cause major charlie horses which feel like a pulled muscle. It's really just the after affects of the cramp. I hate those with a passion.

    I'm not a fan of spiders. Good for you for keeping them alive though.

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  14. Ha! I can't even imagine taking Griff to the Gyn! How funny!!!!

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  15. Bottoms up is right!! Oh, and pulling leg muscle while sleeping? You rock!

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  16. Sooo funny! I am never taking Coop to the GYN!

    Ewww, spiders!

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  17. I hate leg cramps ick ick ick and I love that she said she saw your buuuutttt ha ha ha too cute!

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  18. You are very brave about the spiders. lol! Spiders are the one thing that creep me out beyond therapy. LOL!

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  19. Those calf cramps are the worst! Had them a lot while I was pregnant. That's a funny story about the drs! Thanks for ending my week with a smile.

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  20. Great post! Want to hear something funny? I pulled a muscle in my leg sleeping the other day too! I limped on it all week, but it is finally starting to feel somewhat better. I hope yours heals fast too!

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